A Parting Gift
by Pleurez Mes Yeux
Summary: Atem and Yugi have a conversation on the eve of the Ceremonial Duel.


**So, I've been watching the last season of Yu-Gi-Oh while studying and working. Which on the one hand his great. I've seen all the episodes already, so I don't get too invested in them. On the other? So many opportunities for fanfiction and character exploration! I've resisted and tried to be productive for a while, but this idea just wouldn't leave me alone. I was disappointed that we don't really get much of Atem's reaction when he finds out that in order to move on he must be defeated. It crossed my mind just how horrible that must have been to hear, because Tea hit the nail on the head-for him, winning is easy. Losing, though... That's a true test for him.**

 **So here are some of his thoughts in a conversation with Yugi. It killed me a little bit not to stick Kaiba in here somewhere, but I think it worked best as a quiet moment between the two of them. It's not really a conversation I think Kaiba's capable of having, anyway.**

 **Anyway... I hope you enjoy it! Reviews are always greatly appreciated!**

 **~Pleurez**

Yugi felt an anxiety bordering on nausea. Every now and again, he experienced a jolt of panic that made him abruptly stop whatever it was he was doing. He groaned. It would be impossible to construct a deck good enough to beat the pharaoh this way… He ran a hand through his hair, wishing his counterpart would appear. Or acknowledge him. Or just do _something_ to reassure him that things would be alright.

He was so stressed over what was to come in the morning that it never even occurred to him that he might not have been the true source of these bouts of paralyzing fear.

At least, not until he probed the link.

The floodgates opened and he found himself doubled over, so overwhelmed by emotion that he could scarcely breathe.

 _Y—I mean Atem?_

No answer.

 _Atem!_

Silence.

 _Please! Talk to me!_

Reluctantly, the spirit manifested beside his partner. He stood tall—or, as tall as he could manage—, his chin tilted and a cocky grin playing about his lips. _Have you built your deck?_

None of it was real.

Crimson eyes refused to meet his partner's, and his statement was all bluster and bravado.

 _What's wrong?_

 _Nothing._

Yugi arched an eyebrow.

 _I'm fine._ The assertion was too forceful.

 _Atem.. After everything we've been through together, do you_ really _not trust me? Whatever it is, you can tell me. It's okay._

Something flickered in the depths of the spirit's eyes.

 _You've always let me lean on you for strength. Let me return the favor._

A smile tugged at the corners of Atem's lips. _You've grown so much…_ He had always known that Yugi was strong. But he used to be so shy… So timid… He never let that strength shine through. Now… There was a confidence about his charge—a self-assuredness that had been lacking all those years ago.

He sighed heavily.

 _I am afraid, Yugi._

Amethyst eyes softened. _Of tomorrow?_

A nod. There was more—Yugi could sense it. So he waited patiently.

For his part, the pharaoh didn't quite know how to put what he was feeling into words. He was stubborn and accustomed to standing on his own two feet. For so long, he had been the rock upon which others could rely, there to sustain and support his friends. It was difficult now that the shoe was on the other foot, to allow himself to be vulnerable and draw on Yugi for support.

 _I do not belong in this world._

Yugi looked away, brow furrowing as he stared at the puzzle. He knew that. Which was why, as much as he didn't want Atem to go, he'd worked so hard to build a deck that he thought would stand a chance. _I'll do everything I can to help your spirit find rest._

 _Thank you…_

 _But…?_

Atem looked away. When had Yugi become so perceptive?

 _I fear this is the one obstacle I cannot surmount._

The moment Ishizu had given him his final mission, he'd slammed up his walls, trying to keep his emotions from spilling over the link. And he'd proceeded to lock himself in his own private hell, terrified but unwilling to say anything and cause his friends to worry. He knew the revelation had been difficult enough without him adding to it.

 _I don't understand._

 _Yugi. I_ can't _lose._

It would have been a lie to say that the assertion hadn't hurt Yugi just a little. _Would you rather duel Kaiba? I mean—_

 _No!_ He grimaced. _I didn't mean to_ you _, Yugi. If anyone can set me free, it would be you._

 _Then…?_

 _What I mean is… Yugi, I can't lose. Period. To anyone._

Suddenly, visions of the Orichalcos spilled across the link. Memories of playing the Seal, being so desperate to win that he would do _anything_ to defeat his opponent, even if he knew it was wrong. Because losing just… It couldn't happen. He couldn't allow it.

 _Oh…_

 _When… When I lose, people get hurt. Unless… Unless I win, people_ die _. And…_

He trailed off, feeling his throat constricting. In this world… And, from what memories had returned, also in his ancient past… He didn't lose. It just wasn't even a possibility.

Yugi's eyes widened. The spirit had always carried an immense weight on his shoulders, and there had undoubtedly been times when he'd been upset. But Yugi had never seen him look so _scared_ by the thought of a challenge before.

 _It's okay. This isn't a Shadow Game. No souls will be stolen. Whether you win or lose, the world will keep going. I promise._

 _I… I can't,_ the spirit asserted, tremors wracking his form. _I can't… I can't let anyone get hurt._

 _No one's going to get hurt,_ Yugi returned patiently.

 _That is not true!_ Bright, red eyes met purple.

Visions from Atem's mind flooded the link and into Yugi's mind. Faces—him. Kaiba. Tea. Joey. Tristan.

 _I have to… I can't…_

 _Atem, stop._ _You're_ not _being selfish._

 _But…_

 _No. If anything, it would be selfish for us to force you to stay. I mean, you've sacrificed so much for all of us. You've saved us more times than I can count. Now, it's our turn to do the same for you._ He gave a strained smile. _We'll miss you. But once the sadness passes, we'll be okay. Because we can be happy knowing that_ you're _happy. That you're finally where you belong._

Atem looked away, blinking back wetness in his eyes.

 _Come on. Duel me._

 _What?_

Yugi picked cards at random.

 _We can use different decks, so tomorrow's still a surprise. No stakes. Just a game._

 _I don't understand._

 _Then let me show you._

The spirit's brow furrowed.

 _You've taught me so much, Atem. Now, let me teach_ you _something. Like a parting gift. So you'll always have something of me to remember me by._

 _What is that?_

 _All this time, part of me knew that you couldn't stay forever. But, I never really thought about it much. Because, whatever time I had with you, I knew I wouldn't be able to appreciate it if I focused on the end._

The pharaoh scrutinized the cards on the table, still not entirely sure what that had to do with duel monsters.

Yugi shoved a pile of randomly selected cards at his other half, grinning. _Atem, sometimes it's okay not to think about winning or losing. Sometimes, you can play a game and just enjoy the ride._


End file.
